Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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