Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize