As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
