The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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