i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
