I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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