I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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