i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He shit in the fireplace
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize