Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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