Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
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