scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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