Will you blow on my dice?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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