I'm jealous of your bromance
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
