did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Randomize
