they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I pour the whiskey from now on
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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