I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
