And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
