worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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