i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
