I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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