margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
