i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
