He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Let's get the cat blown out
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
