after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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