We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
