Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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