That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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