My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize
