there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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