I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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