id be glad to
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
