Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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