If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Randomize