I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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