420 ftw
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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