you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Barsexuality is the new black.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
