what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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