Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Randomize