ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
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I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
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bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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