My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize