He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
