pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Randomize
