didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
We don't watch enough power rangers
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
