Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Randomize
