hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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