I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize