I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
