Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
