do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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