no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
